Plato has never quite understood how Obama became POTUS - apart from the fact he was a Democrat, and black and did a big line in soaring rhetoric that'd put Moses to shame - oh did did Good Teleprompter.
So how did he come up with this tripe? His speech writers need shooting, quite frankly...
"I mean, think about it, these are the folks who were behind the steering wheel and drove the car into the ditch. So we’ve had to put on our galoshes, we went down there in the mud, we’ve been pushing, we’ve been shoving. They’ve been standing back, watching, say you’re not moving fast enough, you ain’t doing it right. (Laughter.) Why are you doing it that way? You got some mud on the car. Right? (Applause.)
That’s all right. We don’t need help. We’re just going to keep on pushing. We push, we push. The thing is slipping a little bit, but we stay with it. Finally -- finally -- we get this car out of the ditch, where we’re just right there on the blacktop. We’re about to start driving forward again. They say, hold on, we want the keys back. (Laughter and applause.) You can’t have the keys back -- you don’t know how to drive. (Laughter and applause.) You don’t know how to drive.
And I do want to point out, when you get in your car, when you go forward, what do you do? You put it in “D.” When you want to go back, what do you do? (Laughter.) You put it in “R.” We won’t do want to go into reverse back in the ditch. We want to go forwards. We got to put it in “D.” (Applause.) Can’t have the keys back. (Laughter.)
But the fact is, most of the members of the other party voted no on each and every one of these initiatives. No on tax cuts to small businesses. No to clean energy jobs. No to the railroad and highway projects."
Richard Dawkins would be weeping at this point...
Friday, August 6, 2010
Wednesday, August 4, 2010
Cheap house even if you don't need it? Eh?
Sometimes Plato really does wonder at the 'entitlement society' we seem to have drifted into over the last 40 yrs.
Since when is it okay for your circumstances to be pressing enough for you to benefit from taxpayer largesse and live somewhere you couldn't afford in a month of Sundays - and when you can, you can squat there until you drop dead/then bequeath it to your other half or kids irrespective of your wealth?
What a completely WTF policy is that?
Yet Simon 'I have lots of council estates in my constituency' Hughes in up in arms about it - and ticking off the Prime Minister for daring to talk about it because 'it wasn't discussed by the Coalition'.
Who the fuck does he think he is? Plato was surprised at his willingness to bat for the Coalition after the GE, but frankly he's going native again and being very silly.
*off to watch back to back episodes of House MD = cracking stuff*
Since when is it okay for your circumstances to be pressing enough for you to benefit from taxpayer largesse and live somewhere you couldn't afford in a month of Sundays - and when you can, you can squat there until you drop dead/then bequeath it to your other half or kids irrespective of your wealth?
What a completely WTF policy is that?
Yet Simon 'I have lots of council estates in my constituency' Hughes in up in arms about it - and ticking off the Prime Minister for daring to talk about it because 'it wasn't discussed by the Coalition'.
Who the fuck does he think he is? Plato was surprised at his willingness to bat for the Coalition after the GE, but frankly he's going native again and being very silly.
*off to watch back to back episodes of House MD = cracking stuff*
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
Are you tasty?
Well I certainly am considering the number of mozzy bites I've accrued in the last week - I think it's about 20 and counting :-(
The little buggers have nibbled away at any exposed bit of flesh - my love handles, ankles, forehead and yesterday even the hole in the knee of my jeans FFS. Three of them are now itching like hell despite being smothered in anti-wotsit cream.
I even had to hide under the bed clothes last night and sweltered as another evil insect buzzed about my bedroom going zmzmzzzmmzmzmzmzmmzmzmzmz.
I always thought my kitties would eat these obnoxious insects, yet sadly no - they just snooze on the bed like unwelcome hot-water bottles on a warm night.
I used to love warm sunny weather - now I'm turning into a grumpy after weeks of hot, humid and fly ridden weather... still at least I'm not spending anything on electricity or oil!
*goes off to medicine cabinet for more anti-wotsit cream*
The little buggers have nibbled away at any exposed bit of flesh - my love handles, ankles, forehead and yesterday even the hole in the knee of my jeans FFS. Three of them are now itching like hell despite being smothered in anti-wotsit cream.
I even had to hide under the bed clothes last night and sweltered as another evil insect buzzed about my bedroom going zmzmzzzmmzmzmzmzmmzmzmzmz.
I always thought my kitties would eat these obnoxious insects, yet sadly no - they just snooze on the bed like unwelcome hot-water bottles on a warm night.
I used to love warm sunny weather - now I'm turning into a grumpy after weeks of hot, humid and fly ridden weather... still at least I'm not spending anything on electricity or oil!
*goes off to medicine cabinet for more anti-wotsit cream*
Sunday, July 18, 2010
Hello World
Dear Fellow Platonians,
I'm having a weird week. A friend recommended me to her bank manager and I now have a working bank account and am about to rejoin the normal world by having a debit card and cheque book as well. It is a surprisingly positive experience for what seems like such a 'process' story.
It all started to go horribly wrong back in March when my bank decided without any warning that I was a crap credit risk and excommunicated me with the grand total of £180 in my wallet and a £500 unauthorised overdraft that they created.
As someone who always earned a good crust - that came as a bit of a shock. The credit crunch stopped my small business in its tracks and now I'm selling up as I can't afford my mortgage and have no real prospect of resuscitating my business as it focused on the public sector.
And then there's the fuss about Mandy's book - he doesn't appear to have said anything that wasn't widely reported before but lots of polytix commentators and Labour peeps are up in arms over it - because what they didn't want to admit was true or that what they'd been told was cobblers was also true.
The reason I'm posting about both these things is that often what appears to be the truth - isn't quite what it seems. Mandy put up a very convincing front as did many others about the warfare going on between No 10 and No 11. But it did them no good in the end.
Whilst I've been very fortunate to have been helped/hugged during my crap year - I still pretended things weren't so bad lest I made them feel awkward, myself feel like a failure or worst of all - end up exposed.
That's where Labour missed the point entirely in my view - Gordon and many of their policies were like my nuked business and financial woes. They needed to be faced up to sooner rather than later, but by hanging on and hoping they'd go away - they just got worse instead.
I can't say how glad I am that New Labour has hit the buffers but I fear that it's neither mortally wounded nor so seriously injured that it'll take a long hard look at itself.
Strong and effective opposition is essential for good governance but as it is - it appears that Labour are about to elect either a wonk, a twonk, a hypocrite, a bully or someone who looks like he's about to cry.
That does no one any good.
I'm having a weird week. A friend recommended me to her bank manager and I now have a working bank account and am about to rejoin the normal world by having a debit card and cheque book as well. It is a surprisingly positive experience for what seems like such a 'process' story.
It all started to go horribly wrong back in March when my bank decided without any warning that I was a crap credit risk and excommunicated me with the grand total of £180 in my wallet and a £500 unauthorised overdraft that they created.
As someone who always earned a good crust - that came as a bit of a shock. The credit crunch stopped my small business in its tracks and now I'm selling up as I can't afford my mortgage and have no real prospect of resuscitating my business as it focused on the public sector.
And then there's the fuss about Mandy's book - he doesn't appear to have said anything that wasn't widely reported before but lots of polytix commentators and Labour peeps are up in arms over it - because what they didn't want to admit was true or that what they'd been told was cobblers was also true.
The reason I'm posting about both these things is that often what appears to be the truth - isn't quite what it seems. Mandy put up a very convincing front as did many others about the warfare going on between No 10 and No 11. But it did them no good in the end.
Whilst I've been very fortunate to have been helped/hugged during my crap year - I still pretended things weren't so bad lest I made them feel awkward, myself feel like a failure or worst of all - end up exposed.
That's where Labour missed the point entirely in my view - Gordon and many of their policies were like my nuked business and financial woes. They needed to be faced up to sooner rather than later, but by hanging on and hoping they'd go away - they just got worse instead.
I can't say how glad I am that New Labour has hit the buffers but I fear that it's neither mortally wounded nor so seriously injured that it'll take a long hard look at itself.
Strong and effective opposition is essential for good governance but as it is - it appears that Labour are about to elect either a wonk, a twonk, a hypocrite, a bully or someone who looks like he's about to cry.
That does no one any good.
Monday, July 12, 2010
Blogging Coma
Dear Fellow Platonians,
As you may have noticed, your Supreme Queen has been AWOL since Gordon resigned.
There are several reasons for this, but frankly the main one was that I lost the will to write.
I'm pretty pleased at what the Coalition has managed so far and feel that a huge weight has been lifted from my shoulders psychologically. I simply don't want to hear from Brown, Mandelson or Campbell ever again.
Things are going to be dire for a while and I've been forced to wind up my own business as there is no prospect of a SME like mine which relied on Whitehall spending being a viable concern.
So there we are, I've lost my livelihood and have put my house on the market [no HIPS!!] as I can't pay the mortgage.
But the Coalition are doing the right thing for the country.
I hope that the LDs and Tories continue to grasp the nettle so that peeps like me know the pain was worth it.
As you may have noticed, your Supreme Queen has been AWOL since Gordon resigned.
There are several reasons for this, but frankly the main one was that I lost the will to write.
I'm pretty pleased at what the Coalition has managed so far and feel that a huge weight has been lifted from my shoulders psychologically. I simply don't want to hear from Brown, Mandelson or Campbell ever again.
Things are going to be dire for a while and I've been forced to wind up my own business as there is no prospect of a SME like mine which relied on Whitehall spending being a viable concern.
So there we are, I've lost my livelihood and have put my house on the market [no HIPS!!] as I can't pay the mortgage.
But the Coalition are doing the right thing for the country.
I hope that the LDs and Tories continue to grasp the nettle so that peeps like me know the pain was worth it.
Thursday, May 13, 2010
Monday, May 10, 2010
The real Labour manifesto......
Dear Platonians,
I have some doubts about this list -but hey-ho.The REAL Labour Manifesto, in full:
1. Pretend a terrible defeat was somehow a victory
2. Get together with other defeated parties to steal the election
3. Foist another unelected PM on the people straight after the last one
4. Make sure the most popular party in the country has no say in the government
5. Pretend that this is all part of “progressive governance”
6. Cobble together a ludicrous coalition of tiny parties which ensures that stable government is impossible but who cares as long as we stay in power and keep our ministerial salaries
7. F*ck the people
8. Blatantly betray our explicit manifesto commitment, and force electoral reform on the voters without asking them first
9. Do this deliberately to make sure the most popular party in the country can never be involved in government again
10. Laugh like a hyena in the face of democracy
Many thanx to SeanT for this
I have some doubts about this list -but hey-ho.The REAL Labour Manifesto, in full:
1. Pretend a terrible defeat was somehow a victory
2. Get together with other defeated parties to steal the election
3. Foist another unelected PM on the people straight after the last one
4. Make sure the most popular party in the country has no say in the government
5. Pretend that this is all part of “progressive governance”
6. Cobble together a ludicrous coalition of tiny parties which ensures that stable government is impossible but who cares as long as we stay in power and keep our ministerial salaries
7. F*ck the people
8. Blatantly betray our explicit manifesto commitment, and force electoral reform on the voters without asking them first
9. Do this deliberately to make sure the most popular party in the country can never be involved in government again
10. Laugh like a hyena in the face of democracy
Many thanx to SeanT for this
Tactical Voting - a novel approach
Dear Platonians,
Plato has been seduced by GE antics to post much of anything in AGES and now she's just getting back in the saddle.
Here is a fabulous pee-take by John Loony on www.politicalbetting.com
"As we’re in the mood for discussing bonkers electoral systems, here is one which I invented aseveral years ago. It was inspired by the Winchester result in 1997, when the Lib Dem won by 2 votes.:
Premise:
In Winchester in 1997, some Labour supporters voted Lib Dem tactically because they wanted to get out the Conservative. Some thought that it was a safe Conservative seat anyway, so stayed voting Labour. But seeing the result, they wished they had voted tactically for the Lib Dem (and would have been happy to do so). Similarly, some Conservative supporters might have voted Lib Dem because thy wanted to protest against the Conservative Party, but were not expecting the Conservative actually to be defeated. Another problem is that lots of people voted Labour in desperation, wanting the Conservative government to be defeated, but were shocked by size of the national landslide.
Solution: Chronological Tactical Voting
In the polling booth, there is a computerised voting/counting machine. The computer tells the voter what the result of the election is so far, based on the votes cast already. It gives the number of votes cast so far in the constituency, and also the number of seats for each party in the country as a whole (also based on who is in the lead so far in each constituency).
Voters who are strong supporters of one particular party go and vote early, because they want to vote for their chosen party regardless of tactical considerations. Voters who want to vote tactically go and vote later, so that they can get a good idea of how the result is likely to go. As they leave the voting booth, their memory is wiped so that they can’t leak the result so far to anybody else - people still have the excitement of watching the results show on TV.
Variation: Instant Tactical Voting
Everybody in the whole country is wired up to a voting machine all at the same time.
Everybody votes, by selecting their chosen candidate.
The voting machine instantly counts the votes and gives a result after a few seconds - again, both for the individual constituency, and for the seats for the nation as a whole.
After allowing everybody a minute or so to consider the result, the machine asks “Considering the result you have provisionally given, do you want to reconsider your choice?”.
Supporters of minor parties in marginal constituencies will transfer their votes to the top two candidates, if they are in the mood to do so.
Supporters of the winners in safe seats may transfer their votes to a minor party, to make a protest.
Various other voters will vote differently, according to the results they’ve seen and the overall result they would prefer.
After everybody votes for the second time (all at the same time), the process is repeated. It continues for several iterations until the overall result converges and settles on a final result."
Brilliant!
Plato has been seduced by GE antics to post much of anything in AGES and now she's just getting back in the saddle.
Here is a fabulous pee-take by John Loony on www.politicalbetting.com
"As we’re in the mood for discussing bonkers electoral systems, here is one which I invented aseveral years ago. It was inspired by the Winchester result in 1997, when the Lib Dem won by 2 votes.:
Premise:
In Winchester in 1997, some Labour supporters voted Lib Dem tactically because they wanted to get out the Conservative. Some thought that it was a safe Conservative seat anyway, so stayed voting Labour. But seeing the result, they wished they had voted tactically for the Lib Dem (and would have been happy to do so). Similarly, some Conservative supporters might have voted Lib Dem because thy wanted to protest against the Conservative Party, but were not expecting the Conservative actually to be defeated. Another problem is that lots of people voted Labour in desperation, wanting the Conservative government to be defeated, but were shocked by size of the national landslide.
Solution: Chronological Tactical Voting
In the polling booth, there is a computerised voting/counting machine. The computer tells the voter what the result of the election is so far, based on the votes cast already. It gives the number of votes cast so far in the constituency, and also the number of seats for each party in the country as a whole (also based on who is in the lead so far in each constituency).
Voters who are strong supporters of one particular party go and vote early, because they want to vote for their chosen party regardless of tactical considerations. Voters who want to vote tactically go and vote later, so that they can get a good idea of how the result is likely to go. As they leave the voting booth, their memory is wiped so that they can’t leak the result so far to anybody else - people still have the excitement of watching the results show on TV.
Variation: Instant Tactical Voting
Everybody in the whole country is wired up to a voting machine all at the same time.
Everybody votes, by selecting their chosen candidate.
The voting machine instantly counts the votes and gives a result after a few seconds - again, both for the individual constituency, and for the seats for the nation as a whole.
After allowing everybody a minute or so to consider the result, the machine asks “Considering the result you have provisionally given, do you want to reconsider your choice?”.
Supporters of minor parties in marginal constituencies will transfer their votes to the top two candidates, if they are in the mood to do so.
Supporters of the winners in safe seats may transfer their votes to a minor party, to make a protest.
Various other voters will vote differently, according to the results they’ve seen and the overall result they would prefer.
After everybody votes for the second time (all at the same time), the process is repeated. It continues for several iterations until the overall result converges and settles on a final result."
Brilliant!
Tactical Voting - a novel approach
Dear Platonians,
Plato has been seduced by GE antics to post much of anything in AGES and now she's just getting back in the saddle.
Here is a fabulous pee-take by John Loony on www.politicalbetting.com
"As we’re in the mood for discussing bonkers electoral systems, here is one which I invented aseveral years ago. It was inspired by the Winchester result in 1997, when the Lib Dem won by 2 votes.:
Premise:
In Winchester in 1997, some Labour supporters voted Lib Dem tactically because they wanted to get out the Conservative. Some thought that it was a safe Conservative seat anyway, so stayed voting Labour. But seeing the result, they wished they had voted tactically for the Lib Dem (and would have been happy to do so). Similarly, some Conservative supporters might have voted Lib Dem because thy wanted to protest against the Conservative Party, but were not expecting the Conservative actually to be defeated. Another problem is that lots of people voted Labour in desperation, wanting the Conservative government to be defeated, but were shocked by size of the national landslide.
Solution: Chronological Tactical Voting
In the polling booth, there is a computerised voting/counting machine. The computer tells the voter what the result of the election is so far, based on the votes cast already. It gives the number of votes cast so far in the constituency, and also the number of seats for each party in the country as a whole (also based on who is in the lead so far in each constituency).
Voters who are strong supporters of one particular party go and vote early, because they want to vote for their chosen party regardless of tactical considerations. Voters who want to vote tactically go and vote later, so that they can get a good idea of how the result is likely to go. As they leave the voting booth, their memory is wiped so that they can’t leak the result so far to anybody else - people still have the excitement of watching the results show on TV.
Variation: Instant Tactical Voting
Everybody in the whole country is wired up to a voting machine all at the same time.
Everybody votes, by selecting their chosen candidate.
The voting machine instantly counts the votes and gives a result after a few seconds - again, both for the individual constituency, and for the seats for the nation as a whole.
After allowing everybody a minute or so to consider the result, the machine asks “Considering the result you have provisionally given, do you want to reconsider your choice?”.
Supporters of minor parties in marginal constituencies will transfer their votes to the top two candidates, if they are in the mood to do so.
Supporters of the winners in safe seats may transfer their votes to a minor party, to make a protest.
Various other voters will vote differently, according to the results they’ve seen and the overall result they would prefer.
After everybody votes for the second time (all at the same time), the process is repeated. It continues for several iterations until the overall result converges and settles on a final result."
Brilliant!
Plato has been seduced by GE antics to post much of anything in AGES and now she's just getting back in the saddle.
Here is a fabulous pee-take by John Loony on www.politicalbetting.com
"As we’re in the mood for discussing bonkers electoral systems, here is one which I invented aseveral years ago. It was inspired by the Winchester result in 1997, when the Lib Dem won by 2 votes.:
Premise:
In Winchester in 1997, some Labour supporters voted Lib Dem tactically because they wanted to get out the Conservative. Some thought that it was a safe Conservative seat anyway, so stayed voting Labour. But seeing the result, they wished they had voted tactically for the Lib Dem (and would have been happy to do so). Similarly, some Conservative supporters might have voted Lib Dem because thy wanted to protest against the Conservative Party, but were not expecting the Conservative actually to be defeated. Another problem is that lots of people voted Labour in desperation, wanting the Conservative government to be defeated, but were shocked by size of the national landslide.
Solution: Chronological Tactical Voting
In the polling booth, there is a computerised voting/counting machine. The computer tells the voter what the result of the election is so far, based on the votes cast already. It gives the number of votes cast so far in the constituency, and also the number of seats for each party in the country as a whole (also based on who is in the lead so far in each constituency).
Voters who are strong supporters of one particular party go and vote early, because they want to vote for their chosen party regardless of tactical considerations. Voters who want to vote tactically go and vote later, so that they can get a good idea of how the result is likely to go. As they leave the voting booth, their memory is wiped so that they can’t leak the result so far to anybody else - people still have the excitement of watching the results show on TV.
Variation: Instant Tactical Voting
Everybody in the whole country is wired up to a voting machine all at the same time.
Everybody votes, by selecting their chosen candidate.
The voting machine instantly counts the votes and gives a result after a few seconds - again, both for the individual constituency, and for the seats for the nation as a whole.
After allowing everybody a minute or so to consider the result, the machine asks “Considering the result you have provisionally given, do you want to reconsider your choice?”.
Supporters of minor parties in marginal constituencies will transfer their votes to the top two candidates, if they are in the mood to do so.
Supporters of the winners in safe seats may transfer their votes to a minor party, to make a protest.
Various other voters will vote differently, according to the results they’ve seen and the overall result they would prefer.
After everybody votes for the second time (all at the same time), the process is repeated. It continues for several iterations until the overall result converges and settles on a final result."
Brilliant!
Wednesday, April 21, 2010
Tuesday, April 20, 2010
Sunday, April 18, 2010
Friday, April 2, 2010
DIY Campaigning
This is hilariously awful - Labour are so unpopular that no one with serious cash wants to share it with them -and that means they've been forced to resort to asking their members/random members of the public like Plato for cash.
Your Supreme Queen subscribed to their mailing list about a year ago and got radio silence in return [I mean zip, bugger all, not even something in her spam folder]- and then suddenly, about a month ago - BINGO!
Yes, Labour decided to bother about Plato's vote and has asked her to cough up at least once every few days to get them re-elected.
Well, what a load of bollocks.
When the party running HMG can't get enough sponsors to fund a commercial PR and media campaign, voters have a very legitmate reason to query why...
Your Supreme Queen subscribed to their mailing list about a year ago and got radio silence in return [I mean zip, bugger all, not even something in her spam folder]- and then suddenly, about a month ago - BINGO!
Yes, Labour decided to bother about Plato's vote and has asked her to cough up at least once every few days to get them re-elected.
Well, what a load of bollocks.
When the party running HMG can't get enough sponsors to fund a commercial PR and media campaign, voters have a very legitmate reason to query why...
Thursday, April 1, 2010
Wednesday, March 31, 2010
Liar, liar, Gordon's pants on fire!
Plato REALLY dislikes liars - particularly those who pretend to be holier than thou such as Gordon 'Moral Compass' Brown.
The Head of the Office for National Statistics has bitch-slapped Gordon within hours of his BritishJobs4BritishWorkers speech for misleading the public.
Good stuff.
Read more here:
"Michael Scholar: hero. The new head of the UK statistics authority is finally coming to join we lonely crusaders who have long been shouting, as hard as we can, that Gordon Brown makes things up and uses dodgy statistics. Normally, the ONS shut up. But Sir Michael has - wonderfully, inspirationally - written an open letter to the Prime Minister telling him not to lie. Well, not quite in so few words, but this is the plain implication.
What is significant is that Sir Michael is using his job to protect the integrity of statistics in Britain. One of my favourite ever facts is that "65 percent of the UK population do not believe statistics". This is not because the people compiling them are crooked, but because people like Gordon Brown try to willfully deceive the electorate by careful editing and abuse of figures. Usually, the Tories are too witless to complain but Chris Grayling has been on Brown's case with this. And Sir Michael has adjudicated.
This is a healthy step forward for democracy. Next time Brown tries to use dodgy figures - on immigration, knife crime, whatever - he will have to ask himself "will Sir Michael expose me?".
So far, the press has not bothered to expose Brown. Journalists tend to be allergic to figures, a arguments about statistics lose viewers and readers. So statistical lies would never be exposed in newsprint or on airtime. It was a huge weakness in Fleet St which Brown has exploited to the full with his Brownies.
The digital media has filled this gap: there is no opportunity cost. We have endless energy and space to devote to lies.
And now with Scholar on his case, Brown has every reason to be very afraid next time he tries to lie through statistics.
P.S. I don't often do this, but Grayling has just issued a press release showing Brown's lies and how they were nailed. I paraphrase it below. I hope you're reading this, Douglas Alexander, because you repeated plenty of these Brownies on the Today programme last Saturday. Brownies may well be the first casualty of this digital election.
Read the most damning facts here
The Head of the Office for National Statistics has bitch-slapped Gordon within hours of his BritishJobs4BritishWorkers speech for misleading the public.
Good stuff.
Read more here:
"Michael Scholar: hero. The new head of the UK statistics authority is finally coming to join we lonely crusaders who have long been shouting, as hard as we can, that Gordon Brown makes things up and uses dodgy statistics. Normally, the ONS shut up. But Sir Michael has - wonderfully, inspirationally - written an open letter to the Prime Minister telling him not to lie. Well, not quite in so few words, but this is the plain implication.
What is significant is that Sir Michael is using his job to protect the integrity of statistics in Britain. One of my favourite ever facts is that "65 percent of the UK population do not believe statistics". This is not because the people compiling them are crooked, but because people like Gordon Brown try to willfully deceive the electorate by careful editing and abuse of figures. Usually, the Tories are too witless to complain but Chris Grayling has been on Brown's case with this. And Sir Michael has adjudicated.
This is a healthy step forward for democracy. Next time Brown tries to use dodgy figures - on immigration, knife crime, whatever - he will have to ask himself "will Sir Michael expose me?".
So far, the press has not bothered to expose Brown. Journalists tend to be allergic to figures, a arguments about statistics lose viewers and readers. So statistical lies would never be exposed in newsprint or on airtime. It was a huge weakness in Fleet St which Brown has exploited to the full with his Brownies.
The digital media has filled this gap: there is no opportunity cost. We have endless energy and space to devote to lies.
And now with Scholar on his case, Brown has every reason to be very afraid next time he tries to lie through statistics.
P.S. I don't often do this, but Grayling has just issued a press release showing Brown's lies and how they were nailed. I paraphrase it below. I hope you're reading this, Douglas Alexander, because you repeated plenty of these Brownies on the Today programme last Saturday. Brownies may well be the first casualty of this digital election.
Read the most damning facts here
Monday, March 29, 2010
Chancellor's Debate - the summary
Plato takes her hat off to Iain Martin of the Wall Street Journal for this succinct and perfectly formed summary...
"9:12 pm The three get 60 seconds to sum up. Here I've provided a translation.
Darling: You're worried about the future, I'm worried about the future. The future is in front of us, and it's worrying. But it's going to be alright, honestly. It is, really, no, please, come back.
Cable: Let's face it, I am brilliant [wild applause]. Labour are just rubbish and, I am saying this with a straight face, the Tories are in hock to rich men (unlike the LIb Dems who took £2m from a convicted fraudster now in jail and didn't give the money back). And, did I mention that I'm brilliant?
Osborne: I've got through this, it went quite well! I didn't fall over, I'm only seconds away from a beer in the green room, or maybe a glass of wine. The job of the others tonight was to gang up and land a killer blow. And they didn't. The future? It's Gordon Brown or David Cameron. Make your choice."
"9:12 pm The three get 60 seconds to sum up. Here I've provided a translation.
Darling: You're worried about the future, I'm worried about the future. The future is in front of us, and it's worrying. But it's going to be alright, honestly. It is, really, no, please, come back.
Cable: Let's face it, I am brilliant [wild applause]. Labour are just rubbish and, I am saying this with a straight face, the Tories are in hock to rich men (unlike the LIb Dems who took £2m from a convicted fraudster now in jail and didn't give the money back). And, did I mention that I'm brilliant?
Osborne: I've got through this, it went quite well! I didn't fall over, I'm only seconds away from a beer in the green room, or maybe a glass of wine. The job of the others tonight was to gang up and land a killer blow. And they didn't. The future? It's Gordon Brown or David Cameron. Make your choice."
Wednesday, March 24, 2010
Is Gordon a liar? Erm, yes...
Plato has just seen this data from YouGov...
"...On the 5th March 2010, Gordon Brown went before the Committee of Privy Peers to give details regarding military funding during his tenure as Chancellor. Amid allegations by former military generals and civil servants of gross underfunding, Brown distanced himself from the suggestion that he underfinanced the armed forces, stating that during his chancellorship he agreed to every request the armed forces filed to him during wartime. He appeared emphatic that the defence budget had risen ‘in real terms’ every year.
However, the PM has recently admitted to the Commons that he was wrong to tell the inquiry that he had increased defence spending ‘in real terms’. This about-turn comes as the House figures show that while Brown was Chancellor, the MOD’s defence budget fell no less than four times in real terms.
The result is that many have been left questioning Brown’s credibility. 61% of GB adults state that Brown ‘knew the truth all along but thought he could get away with twisting it’, while a further 17% stated that they ‘didn’t know’. While we cannot be certain that the entirety of this 17% are actively unsure about Brown’s integrity, these figures could potentially represent a sizeable 78% among the British public who doubt the PM’s honesty..."
Says it all really.
"...On the 5th March 2010, Gordon Brown went before the Committee of Privy Peers to give details regarding military funding during his tenure as Chancellor. Amid allegations by former military generals and civil servants of gross underfunding, Brown distanced himself from the suggestion that he underfinanced the armed forces, stating that during his chancellorship he agreed to every request the armed forces filed to him during wartime. He appeared emphatic that the defence budget had risen ‘in real terms’ every year.
However, the PM has recently admitted to the Commons that he was wrong to tell the inquiry that he had increased defence spending ‘in real terms’. This about-turn comes as the House figures show that while Brown was Chancellor, the MOD’s defence budget fell no less than four times in real terms.
The result is that many have been left questioning Brown’s credibility. 61% of GB adults state that Brown ‘knew the truth all along but thought he could get away with twisting it’, while a further 17% stated that they ‘didn’t know’. While we cannot be certain that the entirety of this 17% are actively unsure about Brown’s integrity, these figures could potentially represent a sizeable 78% among the British public who doubt the PM’s honesty..."
Says it all really.
Friday, March 19, 2010
Dear Mr Illegal Immigrant
Plato loved this...
"Virgin Media wrote to 24-year-old Aaron Needham, from Strelley, Nottingham, with details about the company's services.
The letter, sent last week, was addressed to ''Mr Illegal Immigrant''. It continued ''Dear Immigrant''.
She said: ''We have conducted a full investigation into this very unfortunate isolated incident which we can confirm affects just one customer.
''The marketing database that we used to acquire this customer data was purchased from a third party.
''We are now in contact with that third party to investigate this error which we take very seriously.
''We're very sorry for any unnecessary upset this may have caused Mr Needham, this certainly was not our intention.''
Mr Needham said he was offended by the letter: ''I was a bit shocked. I was taken aback. I have tried to ring up and complain and they have not really done anything about it. "
''They kept passing me from pillar to post. They tried to say it was not their fault, it was somebody else. It is not good.''
"Virgin Media wrote to 24-year-old Aaron Needham, from Strelley, Nottingham, with details about the company's services.
The letter, sent last week, was addressed to ''Mr Illegal Immigrant''. It continued ''Dear Immigrant''.
She said: ''We have conducted a full investigation into this very unfortunate isolated incident which we can confirm affects just one customer.
''The marketing database that we used to acquire this customer data was purchased from a third party.
''We are now in contact with that third party to investigate this error which we take very seriously.
''We're very sorry for any unnecessary upset this may have caused Mr Needham, this certainly was not our intention.''
Mr Needham said he was offended by the letter: ''I was a bit shocked. I was taken aback. I have tried to ring up and complain and they have not really done anything about it. "
''They kept passing me from pillar to post. They tried to say it was not their fault, it was somebody else. It is not good.''
Monday, March 15, 2010
Sunday, March 14, 2010
Car Crash Gordon
Dear Honorary Platonians,
Even occasional readers will know that Plato has a vanishing small opinion of Our Glorious Leader's good points and today he did the country a great service.
If ever there was a car crash that could possibly last a whole hour - here it is.
Gordon was bizarrely induced to appear on the Politics Show today to face the music from floating voters apparently keen to know why they should vote Labour.
Unfortunately for Gordon, they actually turned out to be a very articulate audience with a serious axe to grind over Labour's record. The Old Labour welder who said he couldn't vote for them again with him as leader was a corker.
He squirmed in his chair, used shut-up hand gestures, appeared defensive and sullen as a teenager caught skipping school. He even managed to tell the audience that he was 'right' despite what the generals said.
Team Cameron and Clegg must have been watching open-mouthed with delight.
I was!
The Politics Show - watch the horror here
Even occasional readers will know that Plato has a vanishing small opinion of Our Glorious Leader's good points and today he did the country a great service.
If ever there was a car crash that could possibly last a whole hour - here it is.
Gordon was bizarrely induced to appear on the Politics Show today to face the music from floating voters apparently keen to know why they should vote Labour.
Unfortunately for Gordon, they actually turned out to be a very articulate audience with a serious axe to grind over Labour's record. The Old Labour welder who said he couldn't vote for them again with him as leader was a corker.
He squirmed in his chair, used shut-up hand gestures, appeared defensive and sullen as a teenager caught skipping school. He even managed to tell the audience that he was 'right' despite what the generals said.
Team Cameron and Clegg must have been watching open-mouthed with delight.
I was!
The Politics Show - watch the horror here
Saturday, March 13, 2010
Thursday, March 11, 2010
More Gordon lies
Plato is getting exasperated with the MSM - thankfully Jeff Randall is in possesion of his marbles...here's an extract from his latest column.
"With bravado that can be invoked only by someone whose emotional intelligence is buried in a vault of self-delusion, the Prime Minister announced this week that the Budget will be on March 24.
His accompanying comments about "character" appeared to have been scripted by a comedian in need of some fresh material.
"For better or worse, with me what you see is what you get," said Mr Brown. It is a line so at odds with reality, so manifestly untrue, so utterly ridiculous that one barely knows where to start challenging it.
Was this the same Mr Brown whose shameless evidence to the Chilcot Inquiry was dismissed by Army chiefs as "disingenuous"? The same Mr Brown who unleashed the "forces of hell" on his own chancellor? The same Mr Brown who cannot walk past a national statistic without rebasing its measurement for narrow political advantage (crime, inflation, growth)?
When events defy the Prime Minister's preferred view of the world, he has a remarkable capacity for applying the Tipp-Ex. History doesn't haunt him because he either ignores or rewrites it. No British leader in my lifetime has embraced the technique of veracity evasion with greater enthusiasm.
Mr Brown's most egregious abuse of our credulity, "no more boom and bust", has been expunged from the script. In its place is a claim that his genius saved us from the ravages of an American-inspired crash. Rather than expiate his sins of profligacy, he seeks to exploit them. Financial disaster is repackaged as a tactical triumph: his triumph.
"I won't let you down," Mr Brown promises. Too late, old son, you already have..."
Read the rest here
"With bravado that can be invoked only by someone whose emotional intelligence is buried in a vault of self-delusion, the Prime Minister announced this week that the Budget will be on March 24.
His accompanying comments about "character" appeared to have been scripted by a comedian in need of some fresh material.
"For better or worse, with me what you see is what you get," said Mr Brown. It is a line so at odds with reality, so manifestly untrue, so utterly ridiculous that one barely knows where to start challenging it.
Was this the same Mr Brown whose shameless evidence to the Chilcot Inquiry was dismissed by Army chiefs as "disingenuous"? The same Mr Brown who unleashed the "forces of hell" on his own chancellor? The same Mr Brown who cannot walk past a national statistic without rebasing its measurement for narrow political advantage (crime, inflation, growth)?
When events defy the Prime Minister's preferred view of the world, he has a remarkable capacity for applying the Tipp-Ex. History doesn't haunt him because he either ignores or rewrites it. No British leader in my lifetime has embraced the technique of veracity evasion with greater enthusiasm.
Mr Brown's most egregious abuse of our credulity, "no more boom and bust", has been expunged from the script. In its place is a claim that his genius saved us from the ravages of an American-inspired crash. Rather than expiate his sins of profligacy, he seeks to exploit them. Financial disaster is repackaged as a tactical triumph: his triumph.
"I won't let you down," Mr Brown promises. Too late, old son, you already have..."
Read the rest here
Monday, March 8, 2010
Hattie's Perfect World - The Sex Form
Plato would like to thank Morris Dancer from PB.com for this fabulous link...if only it wasn't necessary to parody this...
The Fink Talks Sense
More commonsense insight and observation from Danny - can we get him cloned?
http://playpolitical.typepad.com/all_sorts/2010/03/there-is-a-chasm-between-what-politicians-say-and-what-voters-believe-argues-daniel-finkelstein.html
http://playpolitical.typepad.com/all_sorts/2010/03/there-is-a-chasm-between-what-politicians-say-and-what-voters-believe-argues-daniel-finkelstein.html
Plato's Twat
Dear Honorary Platonians
Plato has been rather distracted recently and has been neglecting her blog - for that, please accept her sincere apologies.
If you are entertained by Your Supreme Queen's wittering - then perhaps during these lean periods, try following her twittering as a stocking filler.
Plato doesn't post about the contents of her breakfast bucket or whether her shearer enquired about her holiday plans. She does instead share funny or alarming press stories and very occasionally replies to other twats that will make no sense to anyone else.
See Plato's twat here - you know you want to!
Cheerio
Platox
Plato has been rather distracted recently and has been neglecting her blog - for that, please accept her sincere apologies.
If you are entertained by Your Supreme Queen's wittering - then perhaps during these lean periods, try following her twittering as a stocking filler.
Plato doesn't post about the contents of her breakfast bucket or whether her shearer enquired about her holiday plans. She does instead share funny or alarming press stories and very occasionally replies to other twats that will make no sense to anyone else.
See Plato's twat here - you know you want to!
Cheerio
Platox
Sunday, March 7, 2010
Saturday, February 27, 2010
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
Saturday, February 20, 2010
Friday, February 19, 2010
URGH - Feel sorry for Gordon Part 94
Plato will be popping off for a good wash after posting this - is there any low vote-grubbing that Gordon The Courageous won't stoop too?
And if you've missed the speculation - General Election being called for late March is back up there.
"Gordon Brown’s rebranding efforts continued apace today with another emotional interview focusing on his family life.
A few days after the Prime Minister was broadcast speaking movingly about the death of his first-born child, he told a supermarket magazine about his other children’s birthdays and the death of his mother.
Mr Brown’s closest advisors including Lord Mandelson, Ed Balls and David Muir have succeeded in encouraging him to display a softer side.
In the latest personal interview, the Prime Minister revealed that his sons exchange birthday cards with Nelson Mandela and his wife Graca. He said the former South African president was “the most amazing man”.
Youngest son Fraser, three, celebrates his birthday a day before Mr Mandela while John, six, shares a birthday with Graca - “so they send each other cards,” Mr Brown explained. [ Do you believe this ?? Ed ]
The Prime Minister also said he tries to “keep in touch” with Mr Mandela and spoke to him on his birthday last year.
In the interview ahead of the Tesco magazine Mum of the Year awards [ WTF?, Ed ], Mr Brown described how the death of his mother in 2004 affected him.
“You don’t quite realise how much you depended on her until she’s not there,” he said. “Your mother is so central to everything that you are, as well as what you do and how you behave, that it’s very difficult to contemplate life without her.
“Even when my mother was old and finding it difficult to do things, she was always there to talk to and always thinking about how her son was getting on. So when your mother dies it’s the end of an era.
“With her gone you feel a part of what you are has been taken from you too. But the good thing is that a mum’s influence lives on in you.”
He added: “I think she taught me a lot more than I ever acknowledged and you can acknowledge now more easily I think. Never lie or cheat, always do what you consider the right thing and always be dignified in all that you do, and I think that was part of her family upbringing too.”
Mr Brown also said his wife Sarah was a “brilliant” mother. “I can’t begin to say how proud and grateful I am because it just couldn’t happen without her,” he said. [ What you mean all this crying in public and being introduced by her at your party conference in a feeble attempt to pretend you aren't Gordo vs 2.134? Ed ]
And if you've missed the speculation - General Election being called for late March is back up there.
"Gordon Brown’s rebranding efforts continued apace today with another emotional interview focusing on his family life.
A few days after the Prime Minister was broadcast speaking movingly about the death of his first-born child, he told a supermarket magazine about his other children’s birthdays and the death of his mother.
Mr Brown’s closest advisors including Lord Mandelson, Ed Balls and David Muir have succeeded in encouraging him to display a softer side.
In the latest personal interview, the Prime Minister revealed that his sons exchange birthday cards with Nelson Mandela and his wife Graca. He said the former South African president was “the most amazing man”.
Youngest son Fraser, three, celebrates his birthday a day before Mr Mandela while John, six, shares a birthday with Graca - “so they send each other cards,” Mr Brown explained. [ Do you believe this ?? Ed ]
The Prime Minister also said he tries to “keep in touch” with Mr Mandela and spoke to him on his birthday last year.
In the interview ahead of the Tesco magazine Mum of the Year awards [ WTF?, Ed ], Mr Brown described how the death of his mother in 2004 affected him.
“You don’t quite realise how much you depended on her until she’s not there,” he said. “Your mother is so central to everything that you are, as well as what you do and how you behave, that it’s very difficult to contemplate life without her.
“Even when my mother was old and finding it difficult to do things, she was always there to talk to and always thinking about how her son was getting on. So when your mother dies it’s the end of an era.
“With her gone you feel a part of what you are has been taken from you too. But the good thing is that a mum’s influence lives on in you.”
He added: “I think she taught me a lot more than I ever acknowledged and you can acknowledge now more easily I think. Never lie or cheat, always do what you consider the right thing and always be dignified in all that you do, and I think that was part of her family upbringing too.”
Mr Brown also said his wife Sarah was a “brilliant” mother. “I can’t begin to say how proud and grateful I am because it just couldn’t happen without her,” he said. [ What you mean all this crying in public and being introduced by her at your party conference in a feeble attempt to pretend you aren't Gordo vs 2.134? Ed ]
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
Don't Vote Party Wins
Plato was reminded of this earlier today and thought her readers would enjoy this little trip down memory lane... Gordon and the election that never was, turnout and the floating voter...
The BRITS remembered
Plato has never forgotten watching the 1989 BRITS and thinking WTF? If you never saw the worst and most hilarious awards show evah - get your popcorn out.
Sam Fox didn't put her contact lenses in, the artists are announced in the wrong order and on and on...it's worth watching every segment - you won't be disappointed....
Sam Fox didn't put her contact lenses in, the artists are announced in the wrong order and on and on...it's worth watching every segment - you won't be disappointed....
Tuesday, February 16, 2010
Sex with Gordon Brown?
Would you jump into bed with the Prime Minister?
Thought not, here's a hilarious poll about the use of sex toys, gigolos, paying for sex and virginity - all based on voting intention...
"Sex and politics go hand in hand, from unsettling mental images of Edwina Curry and John Major, to unsettling mental images of Lembit Opik and an endless parade of Q-list celebrities, to unsettling mental images of David Mellor and anyone at all.
However, an in-depth look into the sexual lives of the people who support those parties has, thus far, been sadly lacking. Do you want to know what percentage of Conservative voters have paid for sex, or when the average SNP supporter lost his or her virginity? Of course you do. So read on.
Straight down the line
Voters' sexuality divides along party lines much as you might expect, with Conservative voters most likely to be, or claim to be, heterosexual (93 per cent), followed by Labour (92 per cent) and the Liberal Democrats (89 per cent). Liberal Democrats are also the most adventurous, with six per cent describing themselves as bisexual – twice the percentage of the other two main parties – and four per cent of those describing themselves as heterosexual admitting to having had sexual intercourse with a member of the same sex.
'Til death us do part
For all that Labour have been accused of undermining the institution of marriage by allowing civil partnerships for gay couples, their voters are in fact the most likely to be married, with 56 per cent having tied the knot, and the least likely to be co-habiting outside of marriage, at just 12 per cent. Conservative voters are both less likely to be married and more likely to be living with their partner than Labour voters, at 50 per cent and 13 per cent respectively. Perhaps unsurprisingly, Liberal Democrats – being liberal – are by far the least likely to be married (44 per cent) and the most likely to be co-habiting (16 per cent).
Virgin on the ridiculous
Of the three main parties, the Lib Dems are far more experienced in sexual matters than they are in governing. The mean age they lost their virginity was just 18.08 years, nearly six months younger than either Labour voters or Conservatives, although in a strange twist they were also more than twice as likely not to have lost it at all (seven per cent, compared to three for the Tories and Labour). Interestingly Labour voters were more likely to lose theirs below the age of consent – six per cent having their first sexual experience between the ages of 13 and 14.
The lady's not for turning
While Labour voters' choice of sexual position is split three ways (so to speak) between missionary, “doggy-style” and woman-on-top (23 per cent each), Conservatives' clear favourite (27 per cent) is woman-on-top. Whether this is a hangover from the Thatcher years is not clear from the data.
It's business, it's business time
If it's instant gratification you're after, Labour voters are the place to go. One in 20 (five per cent) say that they expect to have sex on the first date, compared to three per cent of Lib Dems and a meagre two per cent of the frosty Conservatives. Going out with a Liberal Democrat could be a frustrating experience: one-third (33 per cent) will make you wait until the fifth date or – if you can imagine such a torment – even longer.
Coming clean
If you like a lady to scream your name, go out with a Labour voter; 40 per cent of Labour-voting women always have an orgasm when they have sex. We have no way of showing with the data which way the causal arrow points, or we would suggest women vote Labour simply in order to get their rocks off.
Toy story
Those kinky Lib Dems – a whopping 30 per cent own their very own sex toy, compared to just 22 and 24 per cent of Tory and Labour voters respectively. That said, three per cent of Conservatives “prefer not to say”, which is surely just being coy.
Leader of the pack
Hilariously – yet somehow inevitably – not one single non-Labour-voting woman would like to have sex with Gordon Brown. Even among Labour voters Brown only picks up one per cent, while a startling 11 per cent of Tory women would like to jump David Cameron's well-upholstered bones. Labour voters are more likely to sleep with the Old Etonian enemy, with a four per cent score-rate for Cameron. Nick Clegg gets three per cent from the conservatives, 2% from Labour, and five per cent of Lib Dem voters. The least surprising statistic is that the option “None of the above” gets a 90 per cent average score.
Lib Dem voters know good sex
The most vital stat of the lot: a huge 65 per cent of Liberal Democrat women voters have watched Sex and the City, while Labour and the Conservatives are neck-and-neck on 47 per cent.
Porn on the Fourth of July
Tessa Jowell's husband is far from alone. 52 per cent of Labour voters admit to watching pornography, compared to just 46 per cent of Lib Dems and 43 per cent of Conservatives (although again the Tories score highest on the prefer-not-to-say scale 5%; where's Jeremy Paxman when you need him?). What percentage put the cost on taxpayer-funded expense accounts is unclear.
Pros and Cons(ervatives)
Of the three main parties, the Tories are the most likely to have paid for sex, with seven per cent having handed over money to a Soho madam (or similar), compared to five per cent for Labour and the Lib Dems. So if your local councillor goes on a "fact-finding" trip to Amsterdam, you know why.
Find out more about the sex lives of the nation in the Stella Sex Survey 2010 .
The Stella Sex Survey 2010 was conducted exclusively for Stella by YouGov plc. The 1843 respondents (898 men, 945 women) are a sample of British men and women aged 18+. They completed the online survey between 15-18th Jan 2010. The question 'do you use pornography?' was asked to a sample size of 2520 on 18-19 Jan 2010; the question 'how many sexual partners have you had?' was asked to a sample size of 2013 on 22-25 Jan 2010 due to running the questions on different survey. "
Thought not, here's a hilarious poll about the use of sex toys, gigolos, paying for sex and virginity - all based on voting intention...
"Sex and politics go hand in hand, from unsettling mental images of Edwina Curry and John Major, to unsettling mental images of Lembit Opik and an endless parade of Q-list celebrities, to unsettling mental images of David Mellor and anyone at all.
However, an in-depth look into the sexual lives of the people who support those parties has, thus far, been sadly lacking. Do you want to know what percentage of Conservative voters have paid for sex, or when the average SNP supporter lost his or her virginity? Of course you do. So read on.
Straight down the line
Voters' sexuality divides along party lines much as you might expect, with Conservative voters most likely to be, or claim to be, heterosexual (93 per cent), followed by Labour (92 per cent) and the Liberal Democrats (89 per cent). Liberal Democrats are also the most adventurous, with six per cent describing themselves as bisexual – twice the percentage of the other two main parties – and four per cent of those describing themselves as heterosexual admitting to having had sexual intercourse with a member of the same sex.
'Til death us do part
For all that Labour have been accused of undermining the institution of marriage by allowing civil partnerships for gay couples, their voters are in fact the most likely to be married, with 56 per cent having tied the knot, and the least likely to be co-habiting outside of marriage, at just 12 per cent. Conservative voters are both less likely to be married and more likely to be living with their partner than Labour voters, at 50 per cent and 13 per cent respectively. Perhaps unsurprisingly, Liberal Democrats – being liberal – are by far the least likely to be married (44 per cent) and the most likely to be co-habiting (16 per cent).
Virgin on the ridiculous
Of the three main parties, the Lib Dems are far more experienced in sexual matters than they are in governing. The mean age they lost their virginity was just 18.08 years, nearly six months younger than either Labour voters or Conservatives, although in a strange twist they were also more than twice as likely not to have lost it at all (seven per cent, compared to three for the Tories and Labour). Interestingly Labour voters were more likely to lose theirs below the age of consent – six per cent having their first sexual experience between the ages of 13 and 14.
The lady's not for turning
While Labour voters' choice of sexual position is split three ways (so to speak) between missionary, “doggy-style” and woman-on-top (23 per cent each), Conservatives' clear favourite (27 per cent) is woman-on-top. Whether this is a hangover from the Thatcher years is not clear from the data.
It's business, it's business time
If it's instant gratification you're after, Labour voters are the place to go. One in 20 (five per cent) say that they expect to have sex on the first date, compared to three per cent of Lib Dems and a meagre two per cent of the frosty Conservatives. Going out with a Liberal Democrat could be a frustrating experience: one-third (33 per cent) will make you wait until the fifth date or – if you can imagine such a torment – even longer.
Coming clean
If you like a lady to scream your name, go out with a Labour voter; 40 per cent of Labour-voting women always have an orgasm when they have sex. We have no way of showing with the data which way the causal arrow points, or we would suggest women vote Labour simply in order to get their rocks off.
Toy story
Those kinky Lib Dems – a whopping 30 per cent own their very own sex toy, compared to just 22 and 24 per cent of Tory and Labour voters respectively. That said, three per cent of Conservatives “prefer not to say”, which is surely just being coy.
Leader of the pack
Hilariously – yet somehow inevitably – not one single non-Labour-voting woman would like to have sex with Gordon Brown. Even among Labour voters Brown only picks up one per cent, while a startling 11 per cent of Tory women would like to jump David Cameron's well-upholstered bones. Labour voters are more likely to sleep with the Old Etonian enemy, with a four per cent score-rate for Cameron. Nick Clegg gets three per cent from the conservatives, 2% from Labour, and five per cent of Lib Dem voters. The least surprising statistic is that the option “None of the above” gets a 90 per cent average score.
Lib Dem voters know good sex
The most vital stat of the lot: a huge 65 per cent of Liberal Democrat women voters have watched Sex and the City, while Labour and the Conservatives are neck-and-neck on 47 per cent.
Porn on the Fourth of July
Tessa Jowell's husband is far from alone. 52 per cent of Labour voters admit to watching pornography, compared to just 46 per cent of Lib Dems and 43 per cent of Conservatives (although again the Tories score highest on the prefer-not-to-say scale 5%; where's Jeremy Paxman when you need him?). What percentage put the cost on taxpayer-funded expense accounts is unclear.
Pros and Cons(ervatives)
Of the three main parties, the Tories are the most likely to have paid for sex, with seven per cent having handed over money to a Soho madam (or similar), compared to five per cent for Labour and the Lib Dems. So if your local councillor goes on a "fact-finding" trip to Amsterdam, you know why.
Find out more about the sex lives of the nation in the Stella Sex Survey 2010 .
The Stella Sex Survey 2010 was conducted exclusively for Stella by YouGov plc. The 1843 respondents (898 men, 945 women) are a sample of British men and women aged 18+. They completed the online survey between 15-18th Jan 2010. The question 'do you use pornography?' was asked to a sample size of 2520 on 18-19 Jan 2010; the question 'how many sexual partners have you had?' was asked to a sample size of 2013 on 22-25 Jan 2010 due to running the questions on different survey. "
Tears for Piers - the verdict
"The first polling data on how voters are reacting to Gordon Brown’s interview with Piers Morgan is now in. Results suggest that sympathy for the Prime Minster has increased, but that there is marginally less respect.
After watching a preview clip containing highlights of the interview (including the section when Brown became tearful talking about the death of his daughter), just under a third (thirty per cent) of voters said they had more sympathy for Brown – almost twice as many as the proportion saying they had less sympathy for him (seventeen per cent).
But almost a quarter of voters (twenty four per cent) said they had less respect for Brown after viewing the clip – a slightly larger proportion than those who said they had more respect for the Prime Minister.
PoliticsHome interviewed 1,067 adults by email between 12-15 February 2010. Results are weighted by age, gender and political party identification to reflect the population of Great Britain. Data tables are available on request. "
http://www.politicshome.com/uk/article/5683/voters_react_to_brown_interview_more_sympathy_less_respect.html
Billions and billions
The next time you hear a politician use the Word ‘ billion ‘ in a casual manner, think about whether you want the ‘politicians’ spending YOUR tax money.
A billion is a difficult number to comprehend, But one advertising agency did a good job of putting that figure into some perspective in one of its releases.
A billion seconds ago it was 1959.
B billion minutes ago Jesus was alive.
C billion hours ago our ancestors were living in the Stone Age.
D billion days ago no-one walked on the earth on two feet.
E. A billion Pounds ago was only 13 hours and 12 minutes at the rate our government is spending it.
Makes Plato love Gordon even more than ever...
A billion is a difficult number to comprehend, But one advertising agency did a good job of putting that figure into some perspective in one of its releases.
A billion seconds ago it was 1959.
B billion minutes ago Jesus was alive.
C billion hours ago our ancestors were living in the Stone Age.
D billion days ago no-one walked on the earth on two feet.
E. A billion Pounds ago was only 13 hours and 12 minutes at the rate our government is spending it.
Makes Plato love Gordon even more than ever...
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
Labour's new voters
Plato is depressed : (
Just read this small extract to understand why...
"...the Government had "both economic and social objectives for immigration policy"; the benefits included "a widening of consumer choice and significant cultural contributions"; entry controls, on the other hand, "can contribute to social exclusion"; and, most devastating of all, the previous policy of curbing immigration had "no economic or social justification". [Ed, read that sentence again - isn't it meant to be a great thing, that's what we've been told for yrs...]
John Major on Gordon Brown: 'Britain must be put first' Here, at last, is the truth of what the Government really thought about immigration but never dared tell the electorate. There was also, for Labour, a handy political spin-off. Research by the Electoral Commission into the 2005 general election showed immigrants voted for Labour by overwhelming margins. Very convenient..."
Read the rest here.
Just read this small extract to understand why...
"...the Government had "both economic and social objectives for immigration policy"; the benefits included "a widening of consumer choice and significant cultural contributions"; entry controls, on the other hand, "can contribute to social exclusion"; and, most devastating of all, the previous policy of curbing immigration had "no economic or social justification". [Ed, read that sentence again - isn't it meant to be a great thing, that's what we've been told for yrs...]
John Major on Gordon Brown: 'Britain must be put first' Here, at last, is the truth of what the Government really thought about immigration but never dared tell the electorate. There was also, for Labour, a handy political spin-off. Research by the Electoral Commission into the 2005 general election showed immigrants voted for Labour by overwhelming margins. Very convenient..."
Read the rest here.
Labour's Death Tax
Earlier today there was news that Labour might introduce a £20,000 charge on estates in order to pay for a new 'National Care Service'.
WTF??
Here's the Tories response:
"The Conservatives have launched a poster attacking Labour's 'death tax':
As well as online the poster is already up on eighteen poster sites across London.
Earlier, Shadow Chief Secretary to the Treasury Philip Hammond commented:
"Gordon Brown has a track record of saying 'no new taxes' before an election, and then raising them by stealth after it. Labour are now secretly planning another tax - a death tax - to pay for this unfunded, ill-thought out plan for social care.
When you die, a Labour Government would take £20,000 from what you leave to your children and family.
For those with the most modest savings Labour's plans could leave them with nothing. In contrast we want to help people in old age so that they can leave as much of their lifetime's savings as possible to the next generation. We will offer people the chance to pay a one off premium of £8,000 into a voluntary scheme to cover the cost of residential care in old age. So under our plans no-one would be forced to sell their home to pay for care."
Labour's Death Tax
Earlier today there was news that Labour might introduce a £20,000 charge on estates in order to pay for a new 'National Care Service'.
WTF??
Here's the Tories response:
"The Conservatives have launched a poster attacking Labour's 'death tax':
As well as online the poster is already up on eighteen poster sites across London.
Earlier, Shadow Chief Secretary to the Treasury Philip Hammond commented:
"Gordon Brown has a track record of saying 'no new taxes' before an election, and then raising them by stealth after it. Labour are now secretly planning another tax - a death tax - to pay for this unfunded, ill-thought out plan for social care.
When you die, a Labour Government would take £20,000 from what you leave to your children and family.
For those with the most modest savings Labour's plans could leave them with nothing. In contrast we want to help people in old age so that they can leave as much of their lifetime's savings as possible to the next generation. We will offer people the chance to pay a one off premium of £8,000 into a voluntary scheme to cover the cost of residential care in old age. So under our plans no-one would be forced to sell their home to pay for care."
Sunday, February 7, 2010
Zithers
Plato's Mum and Dad brought a zither home from one of their many foreign trips in the 70s - as well as a guitar made from a tortoise... and a lot of questionable African 'tribal' art that seemed over-represented with Easter Island style statues with enormous breasts [perhaps Dr Pachauri would be interested...]
If you're thinking WTF is a zither - enjoy a master at work
If you're thinking WTF is a zither - enjoy a master at work
Friday, February 5, 2010
The penny has dropped
The BBC have just published details of a poll conducted by Populus that shows a big drop in belief in AGW - here's the polling data
And here's an excerpt from their report:
"'Exaggerated risks'
Of the 75% of respondents who agreed that climate change was happening, one-in-three people felt that the potential consequences of living in a warming world had been exaggerated, up from one-in-five people in November.
The number of people who felt the risks of climate change had been understated dropped from 38% in November to 25% in the latest poll.
During the intervening period between the two polls, there was a series of high profile climate-related stories, some of which made grim reading for climate scientists and policymakers.
In November, the contents of emails stolen from a leading climate science unit led to accusations that a number of researchers had manipulated data.
And in January, the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change (IPCC) admitted that it had made a mistake in asserting that Himalayan glaciers could disappear by 2035.
All of this happened against the backdrop of many parts of the northern hemisphere being gripped by a prolonged period of sub-zero temperatures.
However, 73% of the people who said that they were aware of the "science flaws" stories stated that the media coverage had not changed their views about the risks of climate change.
"People tend to make judgements over time based on a whole range of different sources," Mr Simmonds explained.
He added that it was very unusual for single events to have a dramatic impact on public opinion.
"Normally, people make their minds up over a longer period and are influenced by all the voices they hear, what they read and what people they know are talking about."
So - media coverage is helping, but word of mouth is making a big difference too [I know from my own friends what impact a few simple facts can have]. Opinion has shifted massively away from AGW... great news - the door is unlocked, all we have to do now is push it wide open.
Wednesday, February 3, 2010
Tuesday, February 2, 2010
Embarrassing moments No 94
Plato really dislikes Mr Chris Huhne - the Liberal Democrat MP for Eastleigh - who happens to have a vanishingly small majority of 568.
For readers who are struggling to think who he is - just think of a really smug multi-millionaire with too many homes to count who bought a trouser press on expenses [the one on the left, Ed].
A wag described him as being as rich as Creases : D
Now - Plato isn't too keen on John Sopel either, but she blew him a big kiss for this excellent ambush.
She never knew that Calamity Clegg was coined by Mr Huhne as part of his bid for leadership of their Party...
Bores at the BBC have disabled embedding - so watch this hilarious and embarrassing spat here.
Many thanks to johnno for the tip
Many thanks to johnno for the tip
Saturday, January 30, 2010
Team Talk
Plato does love a bit of dressing room pep-talk, and with that in mind, she thought her readers would enjoy this. Harlequins are clearly fans of Ancient Rome...
Thursday, January 28, 2010
Time Machine
Plato does love a good General Election. 1979 was a corking one - and she doesn't just mean the result.
Have a gander at this coverage courtesy of BBC Parliament - Robin Day smoking a giant cigar on the set is just the start - the presenters and commentators are hilarious.
And the famous Swingometer is almost spot on.
Let's hope the BBC manage something of this quality... some hope...
Have a gander at this coverage courtesy of BBC Parliament - Robin Day smoking a giant cigar on the set is just the start - the presenters and commentators are hilarious.
And the famous Swingometer is almost spot on.
Let's hope the BBC manage something of this quality... some hope...
Sunday, January 24, 2010
1997 and all that
Plato's attention has been drawn to a toe-curling edition of Spitting Image - Mandy The Snake is mesmerizing. If only we'd known what we were electing...
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
Obama meets Hilter
Plato's never seen a funny Downfall about US politics, until this - quite brilliant.
If you're not a follower of last night's election to find a new Senator after the death of Ted Kennedy [Mr Many Skeletons], the result that someone called Scott Brown, a Republican - won is probably a so-what moment...it's not.
Massachusetts is like Bootle in electoral terms - it's been a Democrat state since JFK was it's Senator - yes that long ago. His brother Ted was Senator for 47 yrs.
It is almost impossible to overstate just how huge a win this is.
Massachusetts has all its 10 congressmen Democrats, both US Senators Democrats, all statewide elected office holders Democrats, and 175 out of 200 state house members Democrats.
It was the ONLY state that stayed Democrat when Nixon's Republicans took ALL the others.
Seismic.
If you're not a follower of last night's election to find a new Senator after the death of Ted Kennedy [Mr Many Skeletons], the result that someone called Scott Brown, a Republican - won is probably a so-what moment...it's not.
Massachusetts is like Bootle in electoral terms - it's been a Democrat state since JFK was it's Senator - yes that long ago. His brother Ted was Senator for 47 yrs.
It is almost impossible to overstate just how huge a win this is.
Massachusetts has all its 10 congressmen Democrats, both US Senators Democrats, all statewide elected office holders Democrats, and 175 out of 200 state house members Democrats.
It was the ONLY state that stayed Democrat when Nixon's Republicans took ALL the others.
Seismic.
Sunday, January 17, 2010
If you missed it...
Peter Watt knifed Gordon very politely on the Andrew Marr show
7-ish mins worthwhile investing in [shurely you mean 'spending' ? Ed]
http://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/b00q2v1p/b00q2txt/The_Andrew_Marr_Show_17_01_2010/
7-ish mins worthwhile investing in [shurely you mean 'spending' ? Ed]
http://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/b00q2v1p/b00q2txt/The_Andrew_Marr_Show_17_01_2010/
LOL
Dear Honorary Platonians,
Your Supreme Queen has guffawed more in the last 30 mins than ever.
She'd forgotten how funny and risque Have I Got News For You used to be...
And then she tripped across this one - Boris Yelstin and Bill Clinton take the piss, Adam Boulton has almost every New Labour luvvy at his wedding and it goes on and on. It's comedy gold worthy of an Oscar.
Even if you have life - set 30 mins aside for this - truly magnificent.
http://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/b007cly1/Have_I_Got_News_for_You_Series_33_Episode_3/
Your Supreme Queen has guffawed more in the last 30 mins than ever.
She'd forgotten how funny and risque Have I Got News For You used to be...
And then she tripped across this one - Boris Yelstin and Bill Clinton take the piss, Adam Boulton has almost every New Labour luvvy at his wedding and it goes on and on. It's comedy gold worthy of an Oscar.
Even if you have life - set 30 mins aside for this - truly magnificent.
http://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/b007cly1/Have_I_Got_News_for_You_Series_33_Episode_3/
SNAP!
As regular readers will know, Plato is a bit of an animal lover. However, she's not sure that this choice of pet would be her cup of tea...
Can you guess what it is?
"...Mr Weller said the downstairs kitchen, bathroom and hallway were "neutral zones", for both him and Caesar.
"He eats meat and fish," Mr Weller said. "He really likes steaks and salmon, tuna and prawns. I get a lot of it from the supermarket, but it is only the budget ranges.
"He comes in the kitchen sometimes. When he is hungry, he will come when I call his name."
Mr Weller has installed a cat-flap device to allow Caesar to move between rooms. Although he can push the flap himself, for safety reasons an additional shutter is usually in place to control his movements.
"He can push the flap himself but he grunts at me when he wants me to open the shutter," Mr Weller added.
"When I first got him, he was a nightmare. He would take chunks out of me. It was quite painful and there was a bit of blood loss on occasions.
"Now he just lazes about. When I sit on the floor, he will put his head in my lap and I can stroke him. He's as good as gold..."
Can you guess what it is?
"...Mr Weller said the downstairs kitchen, bathroom and hallway were "neutral zones", for both him and Caesar.
"He eats meat and fish," Mr Weller said. "He really likes steaks and salmon, tuna and prawns. I get a lot of it from the supermarket, but it is only the budget ranges.
"He comes in the kitchen sometimes. When he is hungry, he will come when I call his name."
Mr Weller has installed a cat-flap device to allow Caesar to move between rooms. Although he can push the flap himself, for safety reasons an additional shutter is usually in place to control his movements.
"He can push the flap himself but he grunts at me when he wants me to open the shutter," Mr Weller added.
"When I first got him, he was a nightmare. He would take chunks out of me. It was quite painful and there was a bit of blood loss on occasions.
"Now he just lazes about. When I sit on the floor, he will put his head in my lap and I can stroke him. He's as good as gold..."
Yes a crocodile
Friday, January 15, 2010
I am Spartacus
Revenge of Mr Potato Head?
Plato did laugh heartily at this risible bit of media 'awareness' building... The Register has a great post about it.
Here's a taster:
"The Identity and Passport Service's hilariously triste efforts to make ID cards cuddly has passed another millstone (shurely 'milestone?' - Ed). As a follow-up to plastering its propaganda with happy fingerprints, IPS now has a flash animation of them as well - derived, weirdly, from a movie you might be familiar with.
With a cast of several, IPS, The Movie re-enacts that famous scene from Spartacus with talking fingerprints. Grief, what were they thinking?
An angry-looking mob of fingerprints jostles for position, each crying "I'm Spartacus!" These, presumably, are terrorist, ID and/or benefit-thieving fingerprints. Or possibly underage drinking fingerprints. Best round them up..."
Which MP is this?
Plato invites her readers to guess which MP has the following voting record as published at The Public Whip.
And what are the statistical probabilties of managing to miss every vote from June 1988 to Nov 2004?
[click to enlarge]
ANSWER: Gordon Brown. What a shining example is he to all those concerned with equality, not.
Thursday, January 14, 2010
Mullahed by Andrew Neil
Plato is developing a crush on Andrew Neil - first he clobbered the numpties at the University of East Anglia, and now he's done probably the funniest and most un-PC interview of the last few years with Mr Choudary of lager-swilling/womanising fame who transformed himself into a Sharia loving big beard.
Watch the spat here - Mr Neil keeps asking Mr Choudary [a trained and able bodied lawyer] why he is scrounging off the UK taxpayer when he clearly doesn't think much of their culture or country.
Vintage stuff.
Mr Choudary was outed on Newsnight too - why he's being given so much attention is beyond her.
Wednesday, January 13, 2010
Failed your MOT?
Dear Honorary Platonians,
Your Supreme Queen would like to award the Freedom of Capricornia to Martin Rosenbaum. Who he?
Mr Rosenbaum (FOC) is the excellent and most irritatingly persistent Freedom of Information reporter at the BBC.
He's just managed to extract from the VOSA [that quango that demands you pay a fine if you don't tell them that your car is on-bricks] all the MOT failure data going back years and years.
Now, you may be wondering why it took an FOI campaign to get such obviously interesting and pro-consumer information released... bizarrely, VOSA refused to publish the data on the basis that it could "mislead the public".
Mislead? How can data on MOT failure rates by vehicle make and model do that? Sure some people will flog a car or van into the ground without it ever seeing a spanner - but is this really true for say your average Vauxhall or Peugeot driver?
Now, this wasn't the only reason VOSA gave. They do say that the real reason for a decision or opinion is usually the second one - and here it is:
"The release of information relating to specific make and model would be likely to be commercially damaging to vehicle manufacturers whose failure rates appear higher, and therefore less favourable, than other manufacturers...this information would be likely to be used by some manufacturers to gain a competitive advantage, for example by publicising that their failure rate is lower than another manufacturer's failure rate for a comparable vehicle model."
Erm, surely it's in everyone's interest to know which manufacturers have crap reliability and which don't - and for an element of competition to be introduced based on the MOT rate seems like an excellent idea since they're compulsory...
But still, in the spirit of Professor Phil Jones of University of East Anglia fame - once VOSA felt compelled to release the data, they came up with that familiar wheeze of sticking it into a PDF - all 1200 pages of it - because it would take 'several days' to publish it in a nice convenient format like a spreadsheet.
What sort of crap is this? It didn't start life as a PDF - and frankly Plato would be very surprised if VOSA used Dead Sea Scrollsoft v3.02 to create the original database [perhaps Harry could write them a Hide-The-Decline programme for manufacturers at the top of the failure list]. So it's really handy that Mr Rosenbaum had a copy of Excel handy and converted it from his office chair instead.
Here it is - http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/opensecrets/MOT_Make_Model_Comp_2007.xls
Your Supreme Queen would like to award the Freedom of Capricornia to Martin Rosenbaum. Who he?
Mr Rosenbaum (FOC) is the excellent and most irritatingly persistent Freedom of Information reporter at the BBC.
He's just managed to extract from the VOSA [that quango that demands you pay a fine if you don't tell them that your car is on-bricks] all the MOT failure data going back years and years.
Now, you may be wondering why it took an FOI campaign to get such obviously interesting and pro-consumer information released... bizarrely, VOSA refused to publish the data on the basis that it could "mislead the public".
Mislead? How can data on MOT failure rates by vehicle make and model do that? Sure some people will flog a car or van into the ground without it ever seeing a spanner - but is this really true for say your average Vauxhall or Peugeot driver?
Now, this wasn't the only reason VOSA gave. They do say that the real reason for a decision or opinion is usually the second one - and here it is:
"The release of information relating to specific make and model would be likely to be commercially damaging to vehicle manufacturers whose failure rates appear higher, and therefore less favourable, than other manufacturers...this information would be likely to be used by some manufacturers to gain a competitive advantage, for example by publicising that their failure rate is lower than another manufacturer's failure rate for a comparable vehicle model."
Erm, surely it's in everyone's interest to know which manufacturers have crap reliability and which don't - and for an element of competition to be introduced based on the MOT rate seems like an excellent idea since they're compulsory...
But still, in the spirit of Professor Phil Jones of University of East Anglia fame - once VOSA felt compelled to release the data, they came up with that familiar wheeze of sticking it into a PDF - all 1200 pages of it - because it would take 'several days' to publish it in a nice convenient format like a spreadsheet.
What sort of crap is this? It didn't start life as a PDF - and frankly Plato would be very surprised if VOSA used Dead Sea Scrollsoft v3.02 to create the original database [perhaps Harry could write them a Hide-The-Decline programme for manufacturers at the top of the failure list]. So it's really handy that Mr Rosenbaum had a copy of Excel handy and converted it from his office chair instead.
Here it is - http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/opensecrets/MOT_Make_Model_Comp_2007.xls
Tuesday, January 12, 2010
AGW is linked to piracy - or perhaps not
This is really interesting [if you're as sad as Plato is and loves a good graph].
See how a chart can say almost anything at all...
See how a chart can say almost anything at all...
Sunday, January 10, 2010
Saturday, January 9, 2010
Back to the Future No 94.
Recession, unemployment, estate agents going out of business, people losing their homes?
Pensioners selling up to pay for their care?
Those evil Tories have a lot to answer for since Gordon has been in charge of the purse-strings. Even Dr Who says so...
hat-tip to MB from PoliticalBetting.com
Pensioners selling up to pay for their care?
Those evil Tories have a lot to answer for since Gordon has been in charge of the purse-strings. Even Dr Who says so...
hat-tip to MB from PoliticalBetting.com
Thursday, January 7, 2010
Wednesday, January 6, 2010
So who's for Gordon?
Well, what a bizarre day so far!
According to Mr Fink, here's the list of Gordon's colleagues who have expressed something [Mandy's couldn't be more non-commital if he tried]
"Who's coming out for and against Brown?
Andy Burnham (Health) - Has issued a statement in support of Brown. "My support remains with the Prime Minister. I do not support the secret ballot."
... And said:
"They've misjudged the mood on this one. This wil be gone as quickly as it's arrived.
"It's frustrating: Gordon demolished David Cameron in PMQs today and he's had the better of David Cameron at PMQs for a while now. We were beginning to make inroads, the Tories were beginning to wobble"
Shaun Woodward (Northern Ireland) - Has just been on the Beeb backing Brown.
John Healey (Housing) - Has told Paul Waugh:
“I think most Labour MPs and most Labour party members will think that this is the last thing we need. We have started to see before, over and since Christmas - and again at PMQs today - Gordon Brown hitting his stride and David Cameron is rattled.”
Peter Mandelson (Business) - His spokesman:
"No one should over-react to this initiative. It is not led by members of the government. No one has resigned from the government.
"The prime minister continues to have the support of his colleagues and we should carry on government business as usual."
Thin on Gordon praise though, isn't it?
Ed Balls (Schools) - "Gordon Brown is the best leader to take us into the election and the best person to take Britain through the recession...
"Peter Mandelson put it very well: the cabinet is united behind Gordon Brown. We can win the argument at the ballot box. This week has been a very good week for the Labour government."
Alistair Darling (Chancellor)
Jack Straw (Justice)
Nick Brown (Chief Whip)
Harriet Harman (Commons)
Ben Bradshaw (Culture)
Bob Ainsworth (Defence)
Douglas Alexander (Development)
Ed Miliband (Energy and climate)
Tessa Jowell (Cabinet Office)
Hilary Benn (Environment)
David Miliband (Foreign Secretary)
Alan Johnson (Home Secretary)
Baroness Royal of Blaisdon (Lords Leader)
John Denham (Community)
Lord Adonis (Transport)
Liam Byrne (Treasury)
Yvette Cooper (Work and Pensions)
Peter Hain (Wales)
Jim Murphy (Scotland)
According to Mr Fink, here's the list of Gordon's colleagues who have expressed something [Mandy's couldn't be more non-commital if he tried]
"Who's coming out for and against Brown?
Andy Burnham (Health) - Has issued a statement in support of Brown. "My support remains with the Prime Minister. I do not support the secret ballot."
... And said:
"They've misjudged the mood on this one. This wil be gone as quickly as it's arrived.
"It's frustrating: Gordon demolished David Cameron in PMQs today and he's had the better of David Cameron at PMQs for a while now. We were beginning to make inroads, the Tories were beginning to wobble"
Shaun Woodward (Northern Ireland) - Has just been on the Beeb backing Brown.
John Healey (Housing) - Has told Paul Waugh:
“I think most Labour MPs and most Labour party members will think that this is the last thing we need. We have started to see before, over and since Christmas - and again at PMQs today - Gordon Brown hitting his stride and David Cameron is rattled.”
Peter Mandelson (Business) - His spokesman:
"No one should over-react to this initiative. It is not led by members of the government. No one has resigned from the government.
"The prime minister continues to have the support of his colleagues and we should carry on government business as usual."
Thin on Gordon praise though, isn't it?
Ed Balls (Schools) - "Gordon Brown is the best leader to take us into the election and the best person to take Britain through the recession...
"Peter Mandelson put it very well: the cabinet is united behind Gordon Brown. We can win the argument at the ballot box. This week has been a very good week for the Labour government."
Alistair Darling (Chancellor)
Jack Straw (Justice)
Nick Brown (Chief Whip)
Harriet Harman (Commons)
Ben Bradshaw (Culture)
Bob Ainsworth (Defence)
Douglas Alexander (Development)
Ed Miliband (Energy and climate)
Tessa Jowell (Cabinet Office)
Hilary Benn (Environment)
David Miliband (Foreign Secretary)
Alan Johnson (Home Secretary)
Baroness Royal of Blaisdon (Lords Leader)
John Denham (Community)
Lord Adonis (Transport)
Liam Byrne (Treasury)
Yvette Cooper (Work and Pensions)
Peter Hain (Wales)
Jim Murphy (Scotland)
Tuesday, January 5, 2010
Performance Related Pay at the Met Office
If you are holding a cup of tea or are about to take a swig of something stronger, Plato suggests that you put it down before continuing:
"According to a copy of the organisation’s latest annual report and accounts, John Hirst, the organisation’s chief executive, received between £195,000 and £200,000 in pay and bonuses in 2008/9.
The figure is a 25 per cent increase on the £155,000 to £160,000 "pay equivalent" for Mr Hirst in 2007/8. Mr Hirst had joined midway through the previous financial year in September 2007.
The remuneration package – which includes salary, performance pay, overtime and other allowances – is more than the £192,414 salary paid to Gordon Brown this year. Mr Brown receives £130,594 in Prime Minister’s salary, and £61,820 as MP for Kirkcaldy and Cowdenbeath.
Seven other directors received pay rises of between 3 per cent and 33 per cent. The biggest rise went to Nick Jobling, the Met Office’s chief financial officer, whose total salary jumped by a third to up to £100,000. Campaigners said the payments were “jaw-dropping”.
The large pay rises for the management of the Met Office came despite a series of widely criticised forecasts, including a warm winter in 2009/10 last October..."
"According to a copy of the organisation’s latest annual report and accounts, John Hirst, the organisation’s chief executive, received between £195,000 and £200,000 in pay and bonuses in 2008/9.
The figure is a 25 per cent increase on the £155,000 to £160,000 "pay equivalent" for Mr Hirst in 2007/8. Mr Hirst had joined midway through the previous financial year in September 2007.
The remuneration package – which includes salary, performance pay, overtime and other allowances – is more than the £192,414 salary paid to Gordon Brown this year. Mr Brown receives £130,594 in Prime Minister’s salary, and £61,820 as MP for Kirkcaldy and Cowdenbeath.
Seven other directors received pay rises of between 3 per cent and 33 per cent. The biggest rise went to Nick Jobling, the Met Office’s chief financial officer, whose total salary jumped by a third to up to £100,000. Campaigners said the payments were “jaw-dropping”.
The large pay rises for the management of the Met Office came despite a series of widely criticised forecasts, including a warm winter in 2009/10 last October..."
Monday, January 4, 2010
Sunday, January 3, 2010
Friday, January 1, 2010
Good Riddance
Dear Honorary Platonians,
I don't know about you - but Plato's had a truly crap last few years and is delighted to see the back of the Noughties.
It looked like they'd start out well judging by New Year's Eve 1999...
Plato got a new greyhound called Handsel and was amazed to discover that he was the long lost brother of one she'd just tragically lost to a heart attack.
Buoyed by this good karma, she then plucked up the courage to phone her estranged father - it was scary dialling the number, but if you can't bury the hatchet at the turn of the Millennium - frankly when can you?
They actually *gossiped* - for the first time - ever. That was when the *good* bit ended.
And then he got cancer, and died. Ho hum. And she got a speeding ticket on the 330 mile journey to his funeral...
And then her other half ran off with a work-experience student. That wasn't so bad - but it left her fucked financially.
Now that is normally quite enough bad news for anyone - but there's more than I care to recall and we've only got to 2002...
Fast-forward to 2009, and now her small business has been totally fucked by Labour's handling of the economy and she's thinking of selling up her house and starting all over again.
Plato normally hates 1st January - there's nothing much to look forward to, the fridge is full of things passed their sell-by date and the weather's crap.
This year - 2010 - is already a bit different.
There's a General Election and she'll be down at the polling station the moment it opens, it doesn't matter that it's a safe Tory seat and Cameron thinks AGW is for real [numpty]. She's going to thoroughly enjoy putting her little X in the box.
The fridge contains only edible things [it's amazing how much she doesn't shop when pennies are tight]
And the weather is perfect - crisp, with crystal clear skies and not a breath of wind.
Roll on 2010, as someone once said 'Things can only get better' :-D
I don't know about you - but Plato's had a truly crap last few years and is delighted to see the back of the Noughties.
It looked like they'd start out well judging by New Year's Eve 1999...
Plato got a new greyhound called Handsel and was amazed to discover that he was the long lost brother of one she'd just tragically lost to a heart attack.
Buoyed by this good karma, she then plucked up the courage to phone her estranged father - it was scary dialling the number, but if you can't bury the hatchet at the turn of the Millennium - frankly when can you?
They actually *gossiped* - for the first time - ever. That was when the *good* bit ended.
And then he got cancer, and died. Ho hum. And she got a speeding ticket on the 330 mile journey to his funeral...
And then her other half ran off with a work-experience student. That wasn't so bad - but it left her fucked financially.
Now that is normally quite enough bad news for anyone - but there's more than I care to recall and we've only got to 2002...
Fast-forward to 2009, and now her small business has been totally fucked by Labour's handling of the economy and she's thinking of selling up her house and starting all over again.
Plato normally hates 1st January - there's nothing much to look forward to, the fridge is full of things passed their sell-by date and the weather's crap.
This year - 2010 - is already a bit different.
There's a General Election and she'll be down at the polling station the moment it opens, it doesn't matter that it's a safe Tory seat and Cameron thinks AGW is for real [numpty]. She's going to thoroughly enjoy putting her little X in the box.
The fridge contains only edible things [it's amazing how much she doesn't shop when pennies are tight]
And the weather is perfect - crisp, with crystal clear skies and not a breath of wind.
Roll on 2010, as someone once said 'Things can only get better' :-D
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